The difference between like and respect

I have issues with a lot of people. Fuck it, at times I'm downright antisocial. I prefer my own company, or the company of a few choice friends and family members, as opposed to a massive crowd of people. And as much as I like spending time with loved ones, I like withdrawing just as much.

I used to think that it was a by product of my job. As a journalist, I would speak to dozens of people a week, on a whole range of topics. And when I moved up and was put in charge of two papers, I then had to attend events as a representative of the company and the brand.

However, I think it is more than that. As much as "bullshit fatigue" is probably part of my need to drop out of the human race for a bit, the fact is that a lot of people annoy me. They always have.

I was an advanced child, reading and writing before I started school. In primary, teachers would frequently have to give me work of older children because I would blast through the class work in a fraction of the time the rest of the class needed. I was also conversing regularly with adults - the benefit of having parents who wouldn't dismiss me up to my room at all times - so I was always mature for my age.

As a result, I would see the stuff my peers were doing as silly or childish. It never occurred to me that they were doing the normal things of children their age. Sometimes I did play, but in a "proper" way. I am more prone to whimsy and flights of fancy now than I ever was back then.

Anyway, the reason I explain that is to show that my dislike of people has been ingrained in me from a young age. But, what I have learned over the years, and it's something I'm proud to say I have learned, is that you don't need to like people to respect them.

Doesn't sound too revelatory, does it? Well, it's amazing how many people can't respect people they don't like. 

There are people I downright hate, but I can still respect them for who they are. I might think they are total bastards, but they might be good at their jobs, a good parent or have a great talent. The fact that they are a horrible human being to or in front of me doesn't negate all that other good stuff.

What gets me through many a day is the  understanding that I may not like a person, but I respect them. I don't want to ever go for a pint with them, but I can respect their achievements and who they are. Hell, I can even respect someone who can maintain a complete and utter veneer of bullshit in the face of reality. That takes a lot of work!!

Now, don't get me wrong, respect isn't automatic. I hate people who demand respect before they have shown they deserve it. "Respect your elders" - why, because they have managed to live a long time? Some old people are shitbags, so no. But tell me why I should respect them and at least I can base the decision on merit. I have respect for people who show that they should have it. 

And there's some people I neither like nor respect. But they are the ones I spend zero time and energy on, so I won't waste another word on them.