I state the above to clarify that I am not one of those people who think that mums "have it easy" or aren't as stressed or busy as working women. However....
What I have noticed is that you cannot question a woman once she becomes a mum. If she needs time off work then you can't argue because her children are more important than any reason a childless person may have to get time off. You can't question their dedication to their work, that their priorities may have shifted (which is natural, saying that isn't a criticism) or that they get special treatment.
The fact is that more allowances are made for parents than for any other part of the workforce. The same provisions aren't put in place for religious people, carers or just the ordinary worker. Not being a parent doesn't mean you don't have dependents.
Last year I was in a situation where a colleague went on maternity leave. The manager advertised for maternity cover for a week before she left, and made no secret of how half-arsed he was doing it. So the rest of us had to take on parts of her role for the year she was off. We didn't get a choice, it was just the way it was.
It was during that year that I was signed off with depression. I now know that a wee bit of that was grief after losing Molee but the fact is I was overworked, not doing my job well (and that was really disheartening for a perfectionist like me) always tired, drinking a lot to try and not feel like shit and being a really crappy person. It was too much.
The fact is, I don't blame the woman for getting pregnant and taking the maternity leave she is perfectly entitled to take. I blame the management who let her go without a replacement and piling work on a management team already handling a hell of a lot. I raised my concerns about the work at the time, and had them brushed aside.
Where I work, there is no choice and when you inevitably hit breaking point, you are seen as the weak one, it's never the boss's fault.
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